Questions and Answers

Questions and Answers

On this questions and answers page, I seek to answer some frequently asked questions. They must be important to you, or you’d never have asked them.  If there’s anything you can’t see answered here, please let me know. It might prove useful to others.

A note about personal questions:

I get asked a lot about my personal details. What I do with, or to, other clients during a massage is confidential.  Save your texts, emails and phone calls, because I won’t be getting into any personal details or information.

There are, unfortunately, those who think I am under an obligation to do so. Just a reminder – you have absolutely no right whatsoever to ask. In my experience, only extremely rude people ever do this.

Contact me on WhatsApp

I’m happy for you to contact me using WhatsApp if you prefer. This gives you more options to contact me than using text, email or phone, or by leaving an offline message on Tawkto.  I realise its a useful platform, and costs nothing to use, which can be a game changer.

I try to respond onWhatsApp whenever I can. Though it shows me as online when I’m connected to WiFi, I may not respond immediately if I’m doing a massage, or occupied in some way. Please bear in mind, I’m not into sexting, and will not get into inane, inappropriate, or personal details. Everything about me can be found on the website if you need to know it. What isn’t there is not on offer. When you contact me on WhatsApp, let me know you’ve seen my website, so we’re on the same page.

Mutual touch: 

If you want to engage in mutual touch, read this section very carefully. It’s particularly important you do so, before making an appointment. I often find myself helping someone with my location details, descriptions of the different types of massage, the cost, many of the logistics necessary. But they leave it until the last minute to ask about returning my touch. So hopefully, you’ll find this helpful. 

Mutual touch is case-specific. When I’m asked, over the phone, or by text or email, if touch can be returned during a massage, I’ve no idea, because I can’t see who’s asking. In fairness, I can’t consent to anything before seeing you.

We all have different preferences, tastes, levels of comfort, and connection. One man’s pleasure may be another’s poison. So, if you do ask, please send a current full photo via email or WhatsApp. This must show your physique and face, including your eyes, with no dark glasses on. You can be wearing light clothing or shorts. Close-ups of other body parts are not relevant, and will be ignored.

Your photo helps me decide how I feel we might get on. For those who feel they shouldn’t have to send photos when asking, that’s absolutely fine. But, in that case, I’m not under obligation to answer.

I accept that if you don’t like the look of me, there are plenty of other masseurs to choose, on other websites, elsewhere.

Please read the “Are we a good fit page?” . Consent is a very important part of my work, too. There’s a page about the Wheel of Consent. Please read it, because it’s there to help make sure I give you the most amazing massage. This can only happen when I’m feeling 100% comfortable and at ease with you. If we’re not comfortable with each other, or, I feel I can’t trust you, someone may be disappointed.

If I do allow you to touch me, during a massage, please ensure you’re not so rough or heavy-handed, as to cause discomfort, pain, injury or annoyance. Remember that you also have to ask me first. Don’t just presume. Such conduct is physical assault, and won’t be tolerated. Nobody likes to think they’re not being very nice, as it can upset their self-esteem and sense of worth. But remember, doing things that upset me isn’t nice, either.

If you do anything that’s not comfortable to me, I’ll ask you to stop. We’ll discuss what the issue(s) are, then we can continue. If, having spoken with you, any unacceptable conduct continues, or you re-engage in it, I’ll end the massage immediately, and the full fee will be payable.

Where are you based?

My studio is based in Acton, in the borough of Ealing, in West London. It’s in Birkbeck Road. The post code is W3 6BG.

For the purposes of discretion, the actual house number/ name will be disclosed when you make an appointment and confirm it. The address is visible on the footer ( the large blue area, right at the bottom of every web page on the site).

Hopefully, this answer should help with that.

When are you available? I can’t seem to find it.

I’m available only by appointment, 7 days a week, from 09:00 am until 10:30 pm, and the last massage of the day should be finished no later than midnight. Later appointments than midnight are by arrangement only, and will incur additional costs. Please inquire for details.

My availability information is also on the contact page.

Making appointments:

I work by appointment only, even though my hours are between 9:00am and 10:30 pm. I am very often emailed, sent a text message, or called, asking if I have immediate availability.  I’m not able to offer short notice appointments. This is because I may already be doing a massage.  In this case, you won’t get an immediate reply to a message.

Similarly, if you call me, you’ll go straight through to my voicemail. My phone is always silenced prior to starting, and always during a massage, to avoid disturbance.

I consider my clients at the centre of the Universe when they are paying for my time. To have any form of disturbance would be anathema to me or them.  As always, I’ll respond as soon as possible when I next become available.

It’s always better to check your schedule in good time, and try to book at least a day or so in advance of when you’d like an appointment for.  If you don’t, sadly, I can’t guarantee you’ll be seen when you wish to be. Please give this some thought.

How much notice should I give you?

Realistically, I need as much notice as possible. Many book at least a day or so before. Even then, the time an appointment is needed might not be available, because it’s already been taken. It’s how appointments go, sometimes.

If you’re lucky, you might be able to book an hour or so before, though this is rare. With massage, like anything else, you need to strike while the iron’s hot.

When you choose to book your appointment is in your control, within reason. However, if you contact me at 4 pm, expecting to be seen 15 to 20 minutes later, you’ve unfortunately left it too late.

Do I need to bring anything?

There’s nothing you need to bring with you. Apart from yourself, and your massage fee ( unless you’ve paid into the bank already).

I have a shower for you to use if you need to, as well as a fresh laundered towel. 

I provide the massage oil ( a 50% blend of odourless Coconut and Rice Bran, heated to 42 degrees in a warmer). There’s also black coffee, or herbal teas, and plenty of filtered water.

Can I shower before the massage?

Yes, you can. I actually prefer you to shower when you arrive. Some men can be really sweaty and clammy, especially when they’ve just left work. It’s important for all the massage I offer, since it’s very intimate. You need to ensure you’re intimate areas are squeaky clean, especially cock, sack and crack.

What sort of massage is it?

The massage I offer is sensual. It’s all designed by a man, for men. Have a read about what I do, and watch some of the videos. It’ll give you a good picture of what I do.

If you don’t know what sensual is, and might like to find out, please follow this link to the  Collins Dictionary to be enlightened.

I can’t find your prices.

My prices are shown on the pricing page, inside a rather sexy table. Failing that, they’re also shown in huge purple boxes with white text. To save your time navigating to it, I’ve copied the style and price table for you below. The services I provide are aimed at solvent men only.

Students:

Please note that these premium services are not available to students. Likewise, if you aren’t able to afford the prices, there’s a very well known saying- if you have to ask the price, you can’t afford it.  Any cheeky fellows, who think these prices don’t apply to them, are, sadly, barking up the wrong tree. If you are not solvent, you should not be contacting me in the first place.

Can I choose a Masseur I like?

As I’m a self-employed massage practitioner, who doesn’t employ anyone else, that could be difficult. The pictures and videos show me doing what I love most. So you’ll only be able to choose me.

If you don’t like how I look, that’s unfortunate. There are no other masseurs, or masseuses, to choose from, apart from my competitors.

You might, perhaps, try a more specific search term, if you’re looking for someone who doesn’t have my characteristics.

What do you look like? I can’t see any pictures

There are pictures of me on the website, but, for some reason, some can’t find them. To save your time being redirected to another page, I’ve put some here for you. I hope they’re helpful for you.

Can I just turn up for a massage?

No. Massage is by appointment only. It’s not a drop-in service. There’s no waiting room. It’s a private studio, in a Victorian house, which happens to be one of 8 apartments. 

This is why I’m discreet, and prefer to keep it that way.

When I’m busy, my phone is silenced, which avoids disturbing massage in progress. The buzzer is silenced, for the same reason.  If you turn up, without first arranging an appointment, you risk wasting your time. 

When I’ve done my scheduled appointments, I love spending time weight training at the gym, and also love walking long distances in clement weather, when appointments allow.

I’ve arrived early. Can I come in now?

Please don’t attend your appointment earlier than 10 to 15 minutes. Appointments are arranged so you can have time set aside just for you. That time is sacred. 

For the sake of privacy and discretion, I would be worried about you meeting a previous client when he’s on his way out. It is potentially embarrassing for everyone. 

I pride myself on using discretion, and appreciate the same in others. 10 to 15 minutes early is quite reasonable enough. 

I don’t arrange back to back sessions, because I need to do the necessary cleaning and preparation between clients, and have time for a decent break. A shower, and time needed to be spiritually ready before someone arrives, is equally important.

Can I change the appointment once it’s made?

If you let me know 24 hours in advance, then it might be possible. Bear in mind, there are other clients besides you, who may have booked already. You obviously need to respect this. 24 hours before is the best time to let me know if you can’t attend an appointment. It’s rarely possible to change an appointment on the day it falls. I try to be flexible, but only if existing appointments permit. 

Cancelling 5 or 10 minutes before your appointment suggests you didn’t really want the massage in the first place, nor will you reschedule if you do so. It does, unfortunately, prevent someone else from booking. So please bear in mind, if you do cancel at the last minute, it will prejudice you if you might choose to book in the future. It’s classed as a no-show, and is, sadly, a complete waste of time.

Do you do outcalls to my house or hotel?

This is no longer available. 

I offered this many years ago. Unfortunately, there were a plethora of men who derived entertainment from wasting time in various ways. So, I decided, quite simply, no more. 

If I must come to you, it’ll be expensive. You’ll need to pay in advance, as well. I won’t be available during night hours. Cabs would be the only mode of transport, and late night fares are sky high. More importantly, I need my beauty sleep.

I’m trying to call you, but keep getting answerphone

Please be patient. When I’m doing a massage, the phone is silent, and I’m not available. 

You wouldn’t want your massage experience shattered by a sudden ringtone, so my phone is silenced before I begin. When my client has left, I switch it back to normal. I will do my best to respond as soon as circumstances allow. 

Night time calls can’t be answered, because the phone is scheduled to be silent from 10:30 pm through until 07:00 am. If you would care to leave me a short message, including your name and number, I’ll call you next morning if safe to do so. 

I do not return calls from international or long distance numbers.

I’ve sent several texts- you haven’t replied

If I’m busy, my phone is silent. I don’t like text alert tones, any more than ringtones, while I’m massaging. My clients pay for my time, which is as sacred to me as it is to them.

If you’re expecting immediate replies, you might be disappointed. I do my best to respond when I’m next available. 

There’s something I want to know, but I can’t find it

Should this be the case, please let me know, and I’ll help all I can. It might also be helpful for me to post it as a question and answer topic.

Please confine any question to genuine, appropriate topics, and avoid asking personal questions.

Can the massage help with premature ejaculation?

Yes, indeed it can, as long as you follow any instructions I give during the massage, and allow your body to enjoy the succour of what I do. You must allow yourself to be fully self-aware and not be unduly distracted, otherwise it might not work.

It has a lot to do with your ability to truly relax. Many men fear that they’ll cum quickly, so they stop, rather than relaxing into the joy and energising benefits it can bring to have full body orgasms without ejaculating.

Online Chat

The online chat facility is there to help you, when I’m online, and available to assist you.

I’m not available 24/7, so you’ll need to wait for a response. 

The chat widget is JavaScript powered, which means, it initially pops up automatically. Unless I’m online, and signed in, it’ll prompt you to send an offline message, or email. 

I have no way of knowing who you are when you chat, unless you choose to enter this information. 

Some men are very offended, because I don’t recognise who they are. The chat widget doesn’t reveal your name or phone number. It isn’t even accurate about your location. Please be polite, and remember, you’re speaking to me, not a robot. Please keep your questions appropriate. It is not designed for arranging dinner dates, or asking me personal questions.

Is the massage discreet?

Yes, absolutely. You probably found this website, because you searched for what I offer. 

It shows up for unique, long tail keyword search terms, because I want it to be discreet as well. 

It can’t be found for generic massage search terms, because it would be quite irrelevant, unless someone is looking for something I offer, of course.

Some men worry that my neighbours know what I do. They are, actually, blissfully unaware. This is very important, because I work from home. 

Nobody has the slightest idea why you’re here, or what you may be indulging in. So please don’t worry about being embarrassed. I certainly won’t be saying anything to anyone. 😊

The studio is primarily massage space, hence it’s lavish atmosphere. Without it, I’d have no home. After that, it’s my living space. 

I’m just as cautious as you are about keeping my massage low key. That’s another reason I prefer to use the partial address on the website. To put it all would be careless. I don’t like to think someone would turn up unexpectedly for a massage, especially during the night. 

Any car parking?

Birkbeck Road is a one-way street, approached from Uxbridge Road only. It leads to either a left, or right, turn at the top end into Churchfield Road. If you take a right, there’s a level crossing barrier for the London overground Station, Acton Central, which may cause a block while trains are due to leave or arrive. 

If you need to get back to Uxbridge Road, take a left at the top of Birkbeck Road, keep your eyes peeled for Sainsbury’s on the left, then take a left immediately after, going down Alfred Road. 

This takes you back to Uxbridge Road, where you can head left, towards Shepherd’s Bush, or right, towards Ealing Broadway. 

There are some payable parking spaces, at the lower and upper ends of the road. 

The larger part is parking permit only. It’s restricted from 09:30 am until 5:30 pm. After 5:30 pm you’re safe, the only difficulty then may be finding a space. 

Unfortunately, there is no off street parking available.